QOTD – What did you do on your favorite date?

Hello, Mother Nature, you fabulous looking lady!  It looks like spring has finally decided to start springing! I was away from the office unexpectedly the last two days of last week.  When I was last here, it still looked rather gloomy. Now the technicolour is popping out – the grass is much greener, dotted with bright yellow dandelions. Buds are bursting into bright, beautiful leaves! Makes it difficult to stay in a bad mood, even on the worst of days.
 
Spring is my favorite time of year to be dating! So many possibilities open up in terms of what is seasonably reasonable to do during that (what should be) fun dating period.  Even a date for drinks seems far more enjoyable when it can be done on a sunny patio while swapping stories and laughs. Picnics, Frisbee, mini golf, long walks along the river or through Inglewood Bird Sanctuary. The possibilities in this city are endless!
 
QOTD – What has been your favorite date that you have either gone on or planned?

Upcoming Events! May 15, 28 & 29

One of the biggest challenges is just getting out there to meet new people!  Calgary is an odd city that way.  Many people are friendly, but with how transiant the city has become, it has become much more difficult to meet people – especially if you are a newcomer.

That said, Calgary has a FABULOUS Twitter community.  Tweetups are held regularly and new people are always welcome and encouraged to come out! Just watch Twitter for invites floating around – most are open to anyone, so take a chance and Tweet back to whomever is tweeting about it to find out more.

I have three on the go right now! One is specifically geared towards singles.  All I ask is that if you are planning on attending, just send me a note so I can adjust any reservations or plans accordingly. 🙂 Also, if you do come out and are new, we will make sure you feel comfortable and have a great time!  Nothing worse than being the overlooked new person – it will not happen with me around.

May 15 – #yyceats – This is a group of people that enjoy going out, trying new foods, while enjoying the company of friends.  Ethiopian is the theme for the evening (we will be at Blue Nile in Kensington at 7pm.)  Our third outing & always a great time. The people that attend are different each time, so please don’t be shy about jumping in! Many meet up at The District for a drink or two before dinner. If you do not drive, someone is always happy to have you jump in with them.

May 28 – Our very first singles tweetup! (To my knowledge at least.) Plans are only just forming. If you have ideas, shoot them my way! Right now, we are loosely planning on hitting Garage at Eau Claire Market for an evening of shooting pool and mingling.

May 29 – A welcome to #yyc tweetup for @netchick, who is a wonderful lady from #yvr and was very active in the Twitter community out there. She will have just recently returned from her honeymoon and I am sure will be full of stories to share! Great opportunity for anyone new to come to come out as you are guaranteed to not the only one there.  This will be happening at Brewsters in McKenzie Towne at 2pm. Pray for sunshine as they have an amazing rooftop patio!

QOTD – Do you fall into the ageism trap in your dating life?

Mentally, I had already picked today’s question of the day and started forming my blog post.  Then I got a few suggestions sent to me by various people and started to rethink my plan. Of course this meant that something else go thrown my way in terms of a topic and I am going to run with it.  Proof positive that I have the ability to be flexible about things as the need arises.
 
QOTD – Do you fall into the ageism trap in your dating life? Is it a factor in who you will and will not approach or talk to?
 
Firstly, I want to credit @Reactive_Candy for starting to broach this subject a few weeks ago.
 
The reason I am on this today, is that I have noticed a lot of grumbling about getting older by many on my Twitter feeds lately. Sometimes I do not mind it and somewhat empathize with the person. Others, my eyes roll out of my head – to the point that I might need medical help to put them back in place.
 
AGE IS A NUMBER! That is all. What matters is how you act, feel and approach life.  I know people that are far younger than e in terms of their chronicle age, yet you would think are a bazillionty years old based on how they act. That fact puzzles me.  However I am aware that if someone were to guess how old I am, most would be off by a few years (& I will not lie – that fact makes me gleefully happy!)
 
Yes, I had a breakdown on my 22nd birthday. A few friends literally had to drag me out of bed on that birthday and show me that life did INDEED continue.  Since then I have realized what a waste of time and energy it was to spend time fretting and moping about such a thing. Seriously. Is it really worth it to get all stressed out about turning another day older?! (Just to create waves – your first birthday marks the end of your first year of life. So using that reasoning, doesn’t turning 30 mark the end of the 30th year, therefore you have already survived it?)
 
Blah blah blah… Enough of my ramblings!
 
Age & Dating – My views. I have no hard rules for the most part.
 
I have found that there is a major mental shift in most people around the age of 25. From that point on, most maturing and changes in views occur because of life experiences rather than simply getting older.  As a result, you might be adorable, but I am not going to date you. 
 
Between the ages of 25 – 29, I will consider it on a case by case basis.  Some of my favorite friends fall into this age group, so I know there are some pretty amazing prospects.
 
30 – 40, I do not even think twice about age. At all.
 
41+ it all depends on the person, once again. If it is someone in that age group that very much acts that age ALL THE TIME, they are likely going to get rather annoyed with me at times. Why? I am quite mature, level-headed and approach life that way when I need to, I am also very young at heart and live that way as well. I am terrified of someone stifling that in me, as I think the fact that I am able to be that way is more of a bonus than a detriment.
 
How about you? Where do you fall in this great debate?

QOTD – First (few) date ideas. What are your favorites?

Let’s face it – meeting for coffee or drinks gets old quickly. Especially when you are heavily in the dating rotation. Sure, it is the safe choice but also keep in mind that your choice of date activity on those first few is a great way to let your personality shine and set you apart from all the other people in the dating people! 

Just remember SAY NO TO MOVIES on the first few dates! The whole point of this time is to converse, enjoy each others company and see if there is potential to keep moving forward. Sitting in a theatre does not make for great conversation, unless you want to be hushed by those around you. Plus, you will be judged by the movie you pick. Do you really want that pressure?

Post your ideas here, or tweet me & I will post the best ones later today!

Keep warm, dry and safe on these crazy roads. Happy Cinco de Mayo! Maybe stay home and drink margaritas instead. 😉

Nice Girl = Game Over! Or does it?

As the old adage goes, “Nice guys finish last!” It is not fair to apply that solely to the guys, as I know some wonderful girls that fall into this old cliché.

I am a nice girl! There. It is out there in black & white for all of the interwebs to read. Almost feels as if it should be a dark, dirty secret of mine. Who wants a nice girl?

The last guy I was seeing, our dating came to a crashing end when he confronted me about my tendencies to be a caring, compassionate person that bends over backwards to help others.  In his mind, this made me weak. In my mind, this made me scream NEXT! Yes, I might be a nice girl, but nice does NOT mean stupid. Also, I am not about to change who I am at the core for anyone. Let alone someone that thinks my kindheartedness and willingness to help others is a flaw. I am not a sucker. I will not fork over handfuls of change to a street person, but I will buy them a cup of soup and a sandwich. If a friend or family member is in a jam, I will do anything I can reasonably do to help them. These things come naturally to me and were instilled in me at a young age. I have had people snark on me for it, referring to me as “PollyAnna” for choosing to see good over bad. It is who I am and I am not about to make apologies for it.

Sometimes my niceness does get me down. Men (in Calgary especially) seem to be so busy chasing the Barbie doll type girls, ignoring those that are much more beautiful inside in favour of those close to physical perfection. True beauty is found inward and radiates outwards.  Sooner or later that DOES catch up. I have to remind myself that those men that are searching for arm candy or a trophy wife, are not the kind of men I want to be with and not to let it get me down.

This past week I was blessed with a real life lesson and affirmation in my beliefs on all of this.

My baby brother was home for a visit & brought his girlfriend home for the first time.  Through Facebook & texting, I have had the chance to get to know his girlfriend a little and she seemed quite nice. However, my brother is very metro and has a habit of attracting the Barbie types. That has been stuck at the back of my mind throughout our communications.

Much to my surprise (& pleasure) my brother brought home this amazing NICE girl!  She was who she was. Comfortable with her hair in a pony tail, little makeup and a hoodie. Low maintenance. Kind, considerate, loving kind of person.

(This is where I half hope she never reads this, but if she does, I pray she knows that it comes from the right place and that I love her dearly…)

At first glance, I would dare say she looked somewhat plain. She immediately won me over with her big smile, enormous hug and encouraging words.  She is one of those rare types that oozes happiness and internal beauty. Throughout the week, as I got to know her, it quickly became clear how much of an understated beauty she really is. If she were so inclined, she could turn a lot of heads. But she is comfortable in her own skin and does not feel the need to focus on those superficial things.

Makes me sit back and wonder how many truly beautiful people we all pass over, simply because we are not immediately smacked in the face with an outward beauty. We all know at the heart of us, that in the end, that often goes away. Why do so many put the focus there?

I was fortunate to see that sometimes the nice girls DO finish first (my brother is one hell of a catch & many have tried!) This gives me hope. Still have to wait my turn. I am determined to finish first!

And you? What do think about all of this?

(ETA: My brother fully admits to being happier than ever. I would not be surprised to hear of an engagement in the near future. Score 1 for the nice girls!)

#QOTD – What gross behaviour have you encountered on a date?

Firstly, thank you (I think! :P) to @Smudged  for today’s question of the day.

Drum roll please…

What is the most disgusting/disturbing thing a person has done on a date with you? (ie: pick their nose, socks w/sandals, etc.)

And to satisfy my own curiosity, was this faux pas bad enough to keep you from going out with them again?

Happy Monday! Make this a fantastic week. 🙂