QOTD – What did you do on your favorite date?

Hello, Mother Nature, you fabulous looking lady!  It looks like spring has finally decided to start springing! I was away from the office unexpectedly the last two days of last week.  When I was last here, it still looked rather gloomy. Now the technicolour is popping out – the grass is much greener, dotted with bright yellow dandelions. Buds are bursting into bright, beautiful leaves! Makes it difficult to stay in a bad mood, even on the worst of days.
 
Spring is my favorite time of year to be dating! So many possibilities open up in terms of what is seasonably reasonable to do during that (what should be) fun dating period.  Even a date for drinks seems far more enjoyable when it can be done on a sunny patio while swapping stories and laughs. Picnics, Frisbee, mini golf, long walks along the river or through Inglewood Bird Sanctuary. The possibilities in this city are endless!
 
QOTD – What has been your favorite date that you have either gone on or planned?

QOTD – Do your friends get a say?

Sooner or later in your dating life, you reach the point of introducing that  potential special someone to your friends. Most of us get nervous about this and just pray it goes well. Sometimes it does. Other times, not so much.

How much influence does your friends opinions have on your decision to keep seeing someone? Do you pay attention to & trust their thoughts? Do you do your own thing regardless?

I used to be firmly in the “No way, no how!” camp when it came to listening to anyone else. (Some call me stubborn. I prefer to think of it as tenacious.) As much as it pains me to admit it, I have been burned in a relationship or two. Haven’t we all? In most of those cases, I could have avoided a lot of unnecessary heartache had I listened to my friends. However I was determined to prove them all wrong and went marching ahead. Oops!

Finally I can say that I have reached a point in my life, where I am happy to swallow my pride and listen. The key is to know which of your friends to listen to.  Everyone has an opinion. Question is which of these are ones with your best interest at heart, versus the ones where they is an underlying agenda. Over time I have learned which of my friends to put my trust in. Oddly it is not always my best or closest friends that I will turn to in this case. (Don’t we all have that best friend that is also a cock blocker?!)

I am not about to stop spending time with my friends just because I am in a relationship.  It is important to me that there be harmony and balance in my life. While I don’t need everyone to be madly in love with each other, there does need to be respect and understanding.

That’s my take. What’s yours?

For the mothers in my life… My ode to you!

I had not intended to write a Mother’s Day blog post at all. It really is not what my focus here is about. Also, I am not terribly fond of Mother’s Day myself.  Yes, it is important to acknowledge those in a motherly role, but I very much feel that it is something that should be shown and expressed with great regularity rather than just on one specific day of the year.

My heart and head have been all over the map today. It has saddened me to read rants from people about their mothers, begrudging having to spend time, effort &/or money on these women that have had an impact on their lives. No mother is perfect (I know this all too well, as I have not had the best relationship with my own.) Like it or not, someone had to bring you into this world and give you life. You seriously begrudge a person that has extended this to you, or in some cases someone that may not have had the physical capability to do so, but opened their heart and their arms to make you theirs, a few minutes of your time? This is not about you. This is about them! Use this as an opportunity to say thank you! It really is the least you can do for a woman that helped you get to where you are – whether through positive example and loving, or through difficult lessons that have strengthened and helped you to grow into the person you have become. In most cases, they gave you life, a safe upbringing & some sort of support and nurturing. Is that not worth setting aside any kind of animosity for a few moments?

Motherhood is a challenge. There is no doubt of that. When you bring a new life into the world, you are setting your own heart out there to wander unprotected. This also means that the greatest joys always blossom from these experiences. As a child grows, so does a mother. It is one of those things you will never truly understand unless/until you walk in those same steps.

I am proud to say that I am surrounded by many magnificent mothers, who have taught me a great deal and have inspired me to no end! Some have been people I have known my entire life. Others, I have only known a short time. Please know that each of you have touched me in your own way. So thank you for that! The stories and experiences you have shared have not gone unrecognized, even though I may not always say something verbally. I still tuck that information into my brain and my heart. The stories and photos I have been fortunate enough to see and read have brought many smiles and even a few tears. Forgive me for not naming names, as I am terrified to forget someone unintentionally. BUT, if you are reading this & you know that I know you – whether face-t0-face or because you live in my laptop or Blackberry, YOU are one of these inspirational women in my life.

I am not particularly religious (although I was raised firmly entrenched in it.) However I have a few thoughts to share with you, that although they stem from religion (or religious people) that I am sure will bring comforting thoughts & perhaps a smile about the importance of mothers.

“Motherhood is near to divinity. It is the highest, holiest service to be assumed by mankind. It places her who honors its holy calling and service next to the angels.”

During my professional career as a doctor of medicine, I was occasionally asked why I chose to do that difficult work. I responded with my opinion that the highest and noblest work in this life is that of a mother. Since that option was not available to me, I thought that caring for the sick might come close. I tried to care for my patients as compassionately and competently as Mother cared for me. – Elder Russell M. Nelson

Upcoming Events! May 15, 28 & 29

One of the biggest challenges is just getting out there to meet new people!  Calgary is an odd city that way.  Many people are friendly, but with how transiant the city has become, it has become much more difficult to meet people – especially if you are a newcomer.

That said, Calgary has a FABULOUS Twitter community.  Tweetups are held regularly and new people are always welcome and encouraged to come out! Just watch Twitter for invites floating around – most are open to anyone, so take a chance and Tweet back to whomever is tweeting about it to find out more.

I have three on the go right now! One is specifically geared towards singles.  All I ask is that if you are planning on attending, just send me a note so I can adjust any reservations or plans accordingly. 🙂 Also, if you do come out and are new, we will make sure you feel comfortable and have a great time!  Nothing worse than being the overlooked new person – it will not happen with me around.

May 15 – #yyceats – This is a group of people that enjoy going out, trying new foods, while enjoying the company of friends.  Ethiopian is the theme for the evening (we will be at Blue Nile in Kensington at 7pm.)  Our third outing & always a great time. The people that attend are different each time, so please don’t be shy about jumping in! Many meet up at The District for a drink or two before dinner. If you do not drive, someone is always happy to have you jump in with them.

May 28 – Our very first singles tweetup! (To my knowledge at least.) Plans are only just forming. If you have ideas, shoot them my way! Right now, we are loosely planning on hitting Garage at Eau Claire Market for an evening of shooting pool and mingling.

May 29 – A welcome to #yyc tweetup for @netchick, who is a wonderful lady from #yvr and was very active in the Twitter community out there. She will have just recently returned from her honeymoon and I am sure will be full of stories to share! Great opportunity for anyone new to come to come out as you are guaranteed to not the only one there.  This will be happening at Brewsters in McKenzie Towne at 2pm. Pray for sunshine as they have an amazing rooftop patio!

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QOTD – Do you fall into the ageism trap in your dating life?

Mentally, I had already picked today’s question of the day and started forming my blog post.  Then I got a few suggestions sent to me by various people and started to rethink my plan. Of course this meant that something else go thrown my way in terms of a topic and I am going to run with it.  Proof positive that I have the ability to be flexible about things as the need arises.
 
QOTD – Do you fall into the ageism trap in your dating life? Is it a factor in who you will and will not approach or talk to?
 
Firstly, I want to credit @Reactive_Candy for starting to broach this subject a few weeks ago.
 
The reason I am on this today, is that I have noticed a lot of grumbling about getting older by many on my Twitter feeds lately. Sometimes I do not mind it and somewhat empathize with the person. Others, my eyes roll out of my head – to the point that I might need medical help to put them back in place.
 
AGE IS A NUMBER! That is all. What matters is how you act, feel and approach life.  I know people that are far younger than e in terms of their chronicle age, yet you would think are a bazillionty years old based on how they act. That fact puzzles me.  However I am aware that if someone were to guess how old I am, most would be off by a few years (& I will not lie – that fact makes me gleefully happy!)
 
Yes, I had a breakdown on my 22nd birthday. A few friends literally had to drag me out of bed on that birthday and show me that life did INDEED continue.  Since then I have realized what a waste of time and energy it was to spend time fretting and moping about such a thing. Seriously. Is it really worth it to get all stressed out about turning another day older?! (Just to create waves – your first birthday marks the end of your first year of life. So using that reasoning, doesn’t turning 30 mark the end of the 30th year, therefore you have already survived it?)
 
Blah blah blah… Enough of my ramblings!
 
Age & Dating – My views. I have no hard rules for the most part.
 
I have found that there is a major mental shift in most people around the age of 25. From that point on, most maturing and changes in views occur because of life experiences rather than simply getting older.  As a result, you might be adorable, but I am not going to date you. 
 
Between the ages of 25 – 29, I will consider it on a case by case basis.  Some of my favorite friends fall into this age group, so I know there are some pretty amazing prospects.
 
30 – 40, I do not even think twice about age. At all.
 
41+ it all depends on the person, once again. If it is someone in that age group that very much acts that age ALL THE TIME, they are likely going to get rather annoyed with me at times. Why? I am quite mature, level-headed and approach life that way when I need to, I am also very young at heart and live that way as well. I am terrified of someone stifling that in me, as I think the fact that I am able to be that way is more of a bonus than a detriment.
 
How about you? Where do you fall in this great debate?

QOTD – First (few) date ideas. What are your favorites?

Let’s face it – meeting for coffee or drinks gets old quickly. Especially when you are heavily in the dating rotation. Sure, it is the safe choice but also keep in mind that your choice of date activity on those first few is a great way to let your personality shine and set you apart from all the other people in the dating people! 

Just remember SAY NO TO MOVIES on the first few dates! The whole point of this time is to converse, enjoy each others company and see if there is potential to keep moving forward. Sitting in a theatre does not make for great conversation, unless you want to be hushed by those around you. Plus, you will be judged by the movie you pick. Do you really want that pressure?

Post your ideas here, or tweet me & I will post the best ones later today!

Keep warm, dry and safe on these crazy roads. Happy Cinco de Mayo! Maybe stay home and drink margaritas instead. 😉